CATEGORY:QUESTION/ANSWER ----------------------------- INSIDE GRENADA WEDNESDAY May 02,2007 Dear Karasi, I am a fifteen year old female student. I am in Form 2 of a secondary school. I am really in love with a boy in Form 5 of my school. He constantly asks me for sex and tells me if I love him, I will have sex with him to prove it. I do not want to have sex with him at this time but I am afraid that I will lose him. What do you think I should do? Confused ************************** Dear Confused I have three questions for you, think about them and answer them honestly. 1. What are your career goals? 2. Are you emotionally prepared for a sexual relationship? For example if he leaves you or starts acting weirdly after you have sex with him, will you be able to cope with that? 3. If you were to get pregnant, will you able to care for this child financially? What if you get a sexually transmitted disease? You should never allow yourself to be pressured into having sex. You do not have to have sex with anyone to show them that you love them. If someone loves you, he or she will respect you and your decisions. If you decide not to engage in sex, it's your right. You are in form 2 and are too young to deal with the consequences of a sexually active life. I am not only talking about diseases and pregnancy. There are also emotions tied in to a sexual relationship: what if that's all he wants, what if he leaves you, or tells all his friends, what if your parents found out. Your boyfriend is pressuring you into doing something you don't want to do. And that is wrong. Giving him what he is asking for will not make him love you more. Remember you have to love yourself first. You are young, and there will be a lot of time for that when you are older. There is nothing wrong with saying no, and meaning it. Abstaining is not a crime. Sex can wait; focus on your education for now. Work on developing yourself, have fun, enjoy your childhood, don't rush. And if he decides to hit the road, even though you may cry, remember there will be others. Hold your head high and remember “Condoms are 99% effective; Abstinence is 100% effective - the 1% makes a big difference". Yours Truly, Karasi You can send your questions to Karasi at blu_poet@hotmail.com