CATEGORY:QUESTION/ANSWER ------------------------------ INSIDE GRENADA THURSDAY May 24,2007 by Karasi Dear Karasi, I am 19 years old. I have left school two years ago. I met this guy that I have fallen in love with and I am thinking about having a child. Do you think I am old enough to handle the responsibilities of raising a child? C J ***************************** Dear CJ, Bringing a child into this world is a decision that should be carefully weighted by the individuals involved. It is affected by several factors. You must of course be physically capable of making a child. In addition one must be prepared emotionally, psychologically and financially. In terms of the physical preparedness, I believe that due to your age, you are. However, can you handle the emotional, psychological and financial demands that a baby comes along with? You will be fully responsible for this child. Some people make the mistake of thinking that a baby is all about cute outfits and an adorable face. These are the people who will be hit with a rather rude awakening. A child demands patience, love, constant attention, a lifestyle readjustment and total dedication. When I first read your letter one question came to my mind: What is the real reason you want this baby? Be honest with yourself. Please ensure that it has nothing to do with any of the following: • Your boyfriend wants a baby, and you believe by doing this he will be more committed to you; • You have "baby envy". You see others (friends or family) pregnant or with a bay and you desire one too so that you will not be left out. (Sounds silly, but people do it) • You are replacing this child with an emptiness you feel inside; you need someone to love you, make you feel needed A parent's job is to prepare the individual for life. You are responsible for the future of your nation, and the world. Raising a child will be your contribution to social development. You must instill the values necessary for social improvement. Please note that having a child is a life long commitment; you can't wake up one day and decide you want to quit. Finally I have these questions for you: 1. Financial: Do you have a stable/permanent job? Are you (and your boyfriend) economically capable of providing the basic needs (food (nutritious), clothing, comfortable shelter), and other needs such as healthcare and education? 2. Emotional: Are you able to deal with pressure? Can you handle someone depending on you 24/7? Do you love yourself? 3. Physical: Do you have any medical/physical problems? 4. Socially: How is your relationship with your parents? Do you see yourself as a good role model? 5. Personal: Will your boyfriend support you and take an active part in the raising of your child? If he were to abandon you, how would that affect you? And finally, do you love you? Whatever Decision you make, ensure that it will be beneficial in the long run. Sure, you should have a baby one day but you should be prepared for all the other things that come along with that cute face. Be Strong, Be Love, Be You Karasi